I'm not your typical Christian. I don't fit in with most popular sub-cultures of religion and that's ok, Jesus didn't either. I try to see the beauty of God in everything. Sometimes, it is a beautiful sunset, a smile on my 3 month old's face or just a beautiful picture. Even though those things are definitely beautiful, the most beautiful things can sometimes be when God sheds a tear for us. The recent shootings in Colorado, Chicago and New York or even this homeless lady named Boo who has lost the ashes of her deceased child. God has such compassion for us and often we fail to recognize it and would rather categorize the bad situations of people's lives as God's justice. God is just, but by receiving His grace and mercy every single day I came to the epiphany that God's compassion and love for us conquers all. I could go on all day about that, so I'll save that for a different time.
I began playing guitar at age 5. By the age of 16, I played 5 different instruments. I love music, it is always around me. Having grown up in church, I surrendered to Christ at an early age, so church and music kind of went hand in hand. The problem was my church was traditional. Very traditional. So the music was old and seemed to have died in the chorus somewhere. The choir sang with grim looks as the piano and organ played 4 songs with similar structures and I became bored out of my mind. I would hear things such as "Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine! Heir of salvation, purchase of God, born of His Spirit, washed in His blood. This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long; This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long." Typically, the only thing long was the faces of the people singing the song. (I really do like this song) Then, a teenager at church brought a cassette tape in of dcTalk and I loved it, it was exciting and fresh. After that came a rapper by the name of T-Bone and it was cool, but I couldn't listen to it because it was rap and that wasn't sacred. I was terribly confused because this guy was rapping about how his life was a mess and Jesus came in a took his life over and he had been made this new creation. How could that be what they called secular? On a flip side, I could listen to all the classic rock I wanted. Skynard, Zepplin, Pink Floyd and Journey were my favorite. I could listen to country music too, but I've never really been a fan of country music so I refrained. After this experience, I would eventually be allowed tapes and then cds of christian artists at the discretion of my parents. When I was 15, I joined a praise band and would travel around to churches to play and lead them with praise and worship music. Some churches we played at didn't really like our style, we were either too loud or there was no organ. Then, I met my wife and we began attending at the church she had grown up in and it was worse. The pastor would stand and preach about heathen music and how if it had a beat it was of the devil. Yeah, the evil red guy with a pitchfork and pointy tail. I found his theology and theory flawed as all music has a beat. Otherwise, it would be just a jumbled up mess.
A couple of weeks ago, my family was having lunch with another family from our church and they had just been to a concert the night before. He was talking about how great of a worship experience he had at that concert even though the band was not considered "sacred". The concert was Mumford and Sons and I already love them, so I was interested in what he had to say. He described how at church, worship feels forced and even sometimes hindered. I couldn't have agreed more. He was talking about how at the concert, he was just being himself and worshiping in a way that made sense. At this point, I almost said "Amen". As a musician, I have some great times of worship just playing something random and thinking of things God has done, or lamenting in a time of struggle even if what I'm playing isn't attached to a particular group of words or song. I have to believe that we can worship God in ways that most people wouldn't particularly approve of when the focus is taken off ourselves and is placed solely on God. Isn't that what worship is all about? I have to ask, why all the worship wars when God is the one with the opinion and His stance is He wants all of us, surrendered to Himself from our wants? Why do we try to cater to people when people are not who we are worshiping? Or are they? In a Mumford and Sons song, they ask: "Can you kneel before The King and say, ‘I’m clean’?" and later in the song they sing "Lead me to the truth, and I’ll follow you with my whole life." That's pretty awesome worship lyrics if you ask me. It is a way of people relating to God. How many times have you struggled with feeling like you're too dirty and too far away from God for Him to save you or even hear you? I know I have felt that way a lot. Too many times in Christian music today, issues that we face daily are looked over while feelings we have deep inside of us go unanswered. Another group I like which is the band Gungor tends to do a good job of relating to people and their struggles instead of just celebrating the high points of this spiritual journey.
I know if you have listened to Mumford and Sons though, you are probably thinking "they use a bad word in one of their songs." Why yes they do. Have you ever thought you blew it? That thing you did and you're hiding or it became public probably made you think "I really f---ed it up this time". Well, they just sang it. A moment experienced by the listener is one of total surrender and confession. It's a realization of the need for repentance. I do love a statement made in another song later in the album. It says "In these bodies we will live, in these bodies we will die. Where you invest your love, you invest your life. Awake, my soul. You were made to meet your maker."
Worship to me is the total eviction of me and total focus on God and His mercy and grace. It is a profound conversation between a creation and it's Creator regardless of context.
Luckily, God is so great I can come to Him with questions and He has answers. I can come to Him hurting and He has love. I can come to Him happy and we celebrate. By sending your Son to die and to carry the sin weight of the world, I'm pretty sure God understands my questions and pains. There is no need to hide that, especially in music. Those meaningless words are secular and sacred worship. What does that even mean to call something sacred and something secular?
I created this blog with a verse in mind. Psalm 33:3 "Sing unto the Lord a new song. Play skillfully with a loud noise." God wants our creativity and He wants our praise. He wants our music and apparently, He wants it to be noisy and loud!
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